Breathe....

Good Morning My Confidants

I've had a terrible time getting going today.

Nothing wrong really. Just.... I don't seem to be able to motivate myself.

Maybe I am building up my "oomph" for the fact that I am going to start taking a class today at the Center for Spiritual Living? I am excited about it, but it means... I don't know....

I mean, I am really am excited by the class. I haven't gone to anything like this in years.

And I think it was meant to be! I was telling those in charge that I wanted to go, then this past week I had a HUGE financial set back (it's not anything to be scared about) and it is going to be a few months before I am really sound again. I learned a good lesson. No new "things" for a while!

But just when I said, "I guess I will have to skip this," those who decide these things made it possible for me to pay for it.

I believe that the Universe whispers to us, gives us direction, sends us signs. That might be wackadoodle to some, "witchy woo woo" to others, but it was in a lecture I got to see presented by Deepak Chopra that convinced me of things I already suspected. That there was something very real about "the still small voice." He gave us a lesson in how to look for signs, and how to get better at them, so that you weren't thinking that every penny you find on the sidewalk isn't a "sign." Or is it?

The name of the class is "Mental Equivalents," and what it is about, roughly, is, "For everything created there is a mental equivalent - a picture or image of the idea in someone’s mind. An example of a mental equivalent is the idea for the airplane the Wright brothers had before their belief turned their mental equivalent into a physical reality. For anything that we want in our life - a healthy body, a satisfactory vocation, friends, opportunities - we must furnish a mental equivalent, and understand what beliefs stand in the way."

I was talking about this kind of things with a good friend yesterday and they told me that, "I don’t believe in that." and went on to explain (and I don't want to put words in their mouth, so this person is simply standing in for a lot of people in my life who have said the same kind of thing) that they don't believe in anything they can't see, touch, feel.

I used to be that way.

I also used to believe things because I was taught to. For instance, I believed in Mom's version of God and how there was only ONE way and everyone else—sadly—was wrong, and I was SO fortunate that I was born into a family that believed in this ONLY way. And when I learned about other religions and how all the people that were raised in that way believed that they were the only ones that were right, and I felt so sorry for them. Boy, I didn't want to be in their shoes on Judgement Day!

But then I studied the philosophy of Buddhism (because that really is what it is, a way of living, Buddhists don't worship Buddha/Siddhartha Gautama). And what the ancient teacher taught was not that his teaching was THE way, but the way that he found worked and he suggested we try it out, and if it isn't right for us, to move on to another path.

I was stunned! I got goosebumps.

My personal teacher said the teaching worked side-by-side with many other religions and that it didn't contradict them. I wasn't endangering my immortal soul by studying Buddhism. And I found out true that was.

Which led me finally to the realization that no one's soul is endangered. Wow! I wept in relief! My heart grew "three times that day!" It sang!

I think it is obvious that this is exactly that this class is exactly what I need right now. Can I do it? Maybe I am being lazy because some part of me knows this could be a LOT? And in this period where sometimes I don't want to get up and go to the kitchen to get something to drink, a class will be some work. But then the book discussion I did a couple months ago was work, and it helped me so much.

I simply need to breathe....

I was reminded of that last night. My mind was in a swirl. I couldn't stop THINKING! And when I did fall asleep, that THINKING went right along with me into that world and it was so LOUD it would wake me right back into THINKING!

Then I remembered—quite suddenly—my breathing exercises from my days of going to weekly Buddhist Dharma teachings.

Breath. Close my eyes or focus on something simply—I would up looking at my husband RBear's Himalayan salt lamp—and I counted, slowly, by breaths. One. One two. One two three. Count on the in-breath, count on the exhale, count on the inhale, count on the exhale..... And then Noah was waking me up a couple years later and I had slept right through both their alarm clocks!

So!

Ben!

On the cusp of this new adventure .... breathe.

Who knows what will happen if I only trust? What opportunities are waiting for me? What dreams?

In a few hours, I might get a pretty good hint.

Namaste, my friends.

Love, love, love!

BG "Gentle Ben" Thomas